well. i'd one of the more enlightening conversation(s) over the past few days this year.

there are reasons why we make mistakes. and there are reasons why things go so screwed up sometimes. horrible as they are, these exist so that we can be stronger as a person, to mature as we grow. well, we need to move on and mature, to be able to pick things up and too let it go as i would want it. and there is a need to step out of that barrier that i've put up for myself. open up. open up. yes. open up.

persistence? i need to be able to deal with it a little more.

fear? i needa move out of it. cos' it's biting me so hard that i can't move out of that little jar which has trapped me since i fell into it.

it hurts. of course it does. who says that living in memories dont? cos' those beautiful memories are jus so alluring that you wanna go back and reminisce every bit of it. but the truth is you can't.

we just gotta grow up i guess.



my side note: tons of rants. ohmytians, i'm like finally talking to yuan chang after ten thousand of years cos' he always the mr busy man. he described my change as short hair and braces like LOL. of course i've changed and i can't always be that little girl whom he saw me years back. well. it's good a change i believe. cos' change is the only constant in this world

i want good changes. not bad changes that make me sigh and whine at my pathetic life.